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"Okay, what?" asked Wendy.The longer I talked the madder she got. When I said I might as well go ... she turned sheet white."No!" She stamped her little foot."No?" I don't care if you blow your money on some beatup old tugboat ... if you feel the need, I'm okay with it," she said. "I'm NOT okay with you going. This baby is due within the month and I won't have you leaving me ... holding the bag ... so to speak." I'm staying home, Eels," I said, "Tell me something, Eels?" What?" He was getting upset ... good sized tugs are hard to find."Who owns the wreck?" I asked. I nodded my head forward, indicating the half submerged tug on the other side of the tee wharf."I do," he said. "Why?" I wanna practice on it," I said."Practice?" Yeah ... I want to see if I can raise it, repair it, and maybe use it," I explained. "It would keep me home where I can hear Wendy." Hel, you can have it," Eels said."Got a clear title?" Yeah ... I'll go get it," he said.Eels left the Vellamo and walked across the. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says,“Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?”Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, “Children, I’d like you to close your eyes and taste these.”The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped.“I’ll give you a hint,” said the teacher. “It’s something your mommy probably calls your daddy all the time.”Instantly, Little Johnny coughed his onto the floor and shouted, “Quick! Spit’em out! They’re assholes!”So Little Johnny’s teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny.
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